Top 3 reasons to forget Facebook

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Trust everyone to be party poopers. No sooner had I become comfortable using Facebook, baring my inner thoughts and sharing my pictures, here comes a host of surveys which claim that using Facebook can dramatically lower grades, self-esteem and your ability to make Crème Brule! Okay I made the last one up, but the first two are true. Supposedly!

Forget all these unscientific surveys. I conducted my own survey and got the opinion of the one person truly important to me. Me. And guess what I found? Forget low grades and low self-esteem. There are bigger issues out there, my Facebook friend. So today I present the top 3 reasons you should walk away from Facebook and never look back.

facebook1. Facebook is for the weak minded

I had the shock of my life when I saw I had 23 likes on my Facebook profile. Apparently every time I clicked on any text that is hyperlinked, it got added to my list of Likes. How dare they? I now have Likes listed in my profile that I would not expect a strong, healthy and mature human being to have – Giving up doesn’t mean you are weak, it just means you are strong enough to let go.

What? How could I be insipid enough to like that? Must have been a weak moment – like the time when I had 2 blogs to write, 3 emails to send, and 4 newsletters to create.

Conclusion: Facebook is for the weak minded.

2. Facebook is for those who have nothing else to do – like earn a pay cheque or raise a child

One of the surveys mentioned that multitasking (apparently having a social media site on your computer monitor while you studied) is a no-no since it actually increases the time taken to finish a task.

I am assuming they surveyed human beings for this one. The last time I checked, I would be a total wreck if I cannot multi task. The only reason I make it through the day is because I can check my email on my Blackberry, eat my daily portion of fiber, correct my daughter’s homework, fold my clothes, and prepare a mental list of to-do’s for the next day. All at the same time.

Conclusion: Facebook is for those who have nothing else to do.

3. Facebook is for those who are passing through a mid-life crisis

I was talking to my cousin in Ann Arbor (while doing physiotherapy exercises for my daughter and watching Federer beat the heejeebees out of Soderling in the US Open Quarterfinals) when I asked her if I could connect with her teenage son on Facebook. Apparently not.

The fact is her teenage son does not approve of Facebook and thinks his parents are passing through a major mid-life crisis since they are on it. Ouch!

Conclusion: Facebook is for those who are passing through a mid-life crisis

I hope this article helps you overcome your Facebook addiction and turns you into a spiritually aware, physically healthy, and emotionally centered person that I know you are capable of being.

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this blog are that of mine alone, and do not represent that of the 500 million Facebook fans out there. Of course, if your views are the same as mine, let me know immediately. I suffer from extremely high low self-esteem and need all the help I can get.

Sources (well, more rantings like mine):

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5 thoughts on “Top 3 reasons to forget Facebook

  1. Pingback: Stop all these meaningless surveys about Facebook « Rave Reviews

  2. Pingback: Today’s Social Media Articles October 1, 2010 » Turning Branded Content into Client Conversation!

  3. +10 ! I closed my FB account 2 years ago and have resisted the temptation to reopen it despite about 30 invitations from friends and repeated attempts by FB to get be back by accumulating the invites to make it look like I was missing something big. I loved that comment about becoming “spiritually aware, physically healthy, and emotionally centered person”. The way I see it none of the previous important goals need FB. So no Facebook for me !

  4. Just to let you know that I got an address to your story from Themelis Cuiper’s SocialGarden interviews of socialmedia advertising & social media marketing ;-), you must be doing a very good job as he is pointing towards you.